To Be Honest

I was recently at a party where I had several women tell me (after I had drunk a beer or two and began spurting of stories of motherhood) that I should write a book. First of all- what crazy mother has time to write a book (unless of course she doesn't care about sleep or her children). Second of all, after I deflated my head a bit and took a big dose of humility I realized its sad that people don't get the "truth" about motherhood. And I can't blame social media. Yes, its easy to only post the best pictures of your children, blog only about about your children's wild successes or the many crafts that you have done with them this week. But if these women were laughing at me for telling me the truth that means that don't even hear it from their girlfriends. Their Friday nights Moms Night Out groups apparently are either comparing about whose child is a better crawler (SERIOUSLY??- well the answer is MINE!) or talking crap about their husbands... because apparently nobody is talking about sex after babies, the REAL story of childbirth, how gross toddlers really are, the nights when mommy is the only one crying, the nights when you seriously consider telling the dogs to babysit and hopping in the car for a LONG drive.

A real car ride with a toddler.. I believe I said no to ice cream on a snow day. 

I love being a mom. I adore my boys. But pardon my French- this shit is hard. Being a mom is not for the weary. I'm not sure what the pinteresty moms do to cope. I wish they would show the real picture... Either of the, smoking pot while they are doing the crafts (only way to relax I suppose while making pumpkins out of quilts and having two perfect children sitting nagging you) or post a picture of the nanny.
And date night?  Date? What in the world is that. I hear of moms who get weekend get a ways and weekly date nights! What?! First all our money is going for toddler socks and pacis (both have a knack for coming up missing), diapers and a ridiculous amount of food for two small people under 30 pounds. When we do get to get away we eat so ridiculously fast that we don't even have time to talk about anything but the kids poop routine for the day..." Two dirty diapers huh?" With toddlers you learn to scarf down food because if you don't you don't eat. Someone will need you for something so you better hurry.

And showing up to church on time..... Well that's a blog post all for itself. I love my crazy life-- but sometimes at the end of the day my only prayer is "dear God.... Amen"