Shut My Mouth and Change My Heart

I always feared God would give me a girl . I just knew that if I had a little girl that all my insecurities and body hatred would rub off on her. I was so relieved when I had boys... I had the (WRONG) idea that I therefor didn't have to worry about what I said or thought about my body around my sons.

I WAS WRONG!

This morning as we all sat down to breakfast I noticed that Bryan had made me a ridiculous amount of scrambled eggs.

Me- I need someone to take some of these?
Bry- why?
Me- because I don't want to be fat.

As we were finishing, and yes I finished all my eggs, Ethan looked at my plate and said "oh no, you're fat." He had a true sense of anxiety on his little 3 year old face.

I thought I only had to worry about this with daughters.

Later as we're getting ready for the zoo, I looked down and felt like a slob. At the same time, Ethan came in my room ...

Ethan- what are you doing?
Me- trying to find something else to wear
Ethan- why?
Me- because I don't want to look ugly and fat.
Ethan (yelling down the hall)- mom u\is changing so she won't be fate and ugly for you dad.

I just stood there. What am I teaching him? That girls should always be skinny and worried about their size? That HE should worry about his weight? That mommy isn't happy unless she has her act together? That he can't be happy unless he is skinny and handsome?

I was wrong. My insecurities will wipe off on whoever is around me... The little boys included.

I want the boys to know how God created each of us so perfectly. That we should be thankful, daily, on the vessel he gave us and to take care of it (not tear it down). I want to model a woman who is thinking about her identity in Christ and not her jean size.

God Help Me.

Green Ugly Cupcakes

Dear moms who blog everyday- HOW? I feel like I am an organized mom, but finding time to blog and even think through complete sentences sometimes is difficult. That, my friends, is why we will not be having any more children! =) I can't even handle 2. 

Last week we had Tyler's 2nd Birthday. I love how different the boys are. Ethan is very content with just a few people he knows and loves. Tyler is happier with MORE- MORE of everything. So we had more friends come and join us at a local splash pad for cupcakes, juiceboxes and loads of wet water fun. 

I feel like the 1st birthday is for the parents, but by the 2nd birthday they really can tell you what they like. So I let him pick out all his decorations, snacks and cupcakes. At Sams he pointed out THE UGLIEST color green I had ever seen, with primary color sprinkles and Lightening McQueen art.... so that's what he got. As much as everything in me said "these are the ugliest things i have ever seen!" my heart was happy in seeing Tyler smile with pride at his creations. 

Big Brother was more than happy to help eat the cupcakes and volunteer to "help" Tyler open his gifts. Unfortunately for him, we have a "you dont have to share your toys on the first day" rule at the Head house. So he opened up all the gifts and then realized Tyler didn't want to share ANYTHING. And didn't have to. That boy was VERY EXCITED for Sunday. =) 

My cousin Zack is THE BEST with the little boys. They call him Uncle Zack and I love watching them all together. Zack was a champ to chase them around the water. 

I love how God made this one. He is a burst of energy, testosterone, and cuddles. He LOVES 

dance parties with mommy

wrestling with daddy

cheese sticks and blueberries

his paci.blankie and koala bear when he's tired

school and playing with his sweet friends and teachers

singing songs with the windows down in the car

jumping in the deep end

church and praying for "ethan and elliott" (those 2 are covered!) 

He is certainly harder to parent some days than Ethan, but I continue to pray that God is going to use this strong willed little spirit to His glory. 

It is my joy to be his mom. Can't wait to see what a lifetime of loving this man will bring. 

photoshoot

My boys LOVE to have their pictures taken. To a point where they are little WEIRD about it. Like say last week, when Ethan stood up in the cart in the checkout line of Target and asked the checkout girl "excuse me, can you take our picture?" and put his arm around me. Are you kidding? So, recently the boys and I were trying to things to pass the time before bed and Ethan suggested to take pictures. 

So thus began a Monday night photo shoot. 

These two really do LIKE eachother. Having them so close together was not the easiest at first, but it's certainly paying off now. They are sweet best buddies. 

I love tyler's face!!! 

So, finally Ethan was holding Tyler a tad too tight so I told him "loosen up on your grip," and this is what happened.... 

AWESOME!!

and my faithful boy for the last 12 years.... Old Faithful Jake. Always right under foot lately.

It is done!

Well he did. He is "fully" potty trained. So, for his prize, we promised a date with daddy... and daddy promised a trip to the Disney Store and his choice of lunch. Daddy's hours don't match up with the boys a lot lately, and with the kids nap schedules they are really missing daddy time. Ethan especially is craving more time with daddy. 

Ethan was NOT having me taking pictures. He knew a toy of his choice was waiting. But oh- too cute!!!

Bryan said they had a blast. Ethan picked up EVERY toy in the store saying "this is the one!!".. but didn't get too excited until he saw Buzz Lightyear. 

Then off to Ethan's choice of lunch- Taco Bueno. He is certainly his father's child when it comes to chips and queso. Honestly... have you seen a happier child at the thought of drinking root beer and having chips and queso?!?!?

 Alright here are my tips on potty training. If you want to drink a lot, pull your hair out, be cleaning up pee off the floor/walls/clothes, and be a high wired nut job- potty train early. Compete with your peers... have fun. Want to have fun and stay sain? Wait till their ready! And if that's 3,3.5,4... WHO CARES!! =)

It is a joy to be this boy's mommy. I love celebrating little victories, and hope he does too.

Potty Party

So this is happening. I thought it was brilliant to potty train both boys at the same time. I thought T was too young, but he was asking and talking about it, so I tried.... for 10 minutes. My gut was correct. 

But my big boy E was ready. SERIOUSLY- I am so glad I waited till he was 3. We started and he has stayed dry since the first moment. AWESOME!! So for weeks we have been playing up underwear... and playing IN underwear. Whatever he wanted was fair game. 

So we stayed at home for 2 days, played outside, painted sticks, peed on trees, drank a lot of juice boxes, did a lot of puzzles...  

  the backyard looked like this... chalk, potty, waterguns, and juice boxes.

... and I am sorry but how cute is this Minion bottom. He is awfully proud of himself and so am I!

Last Day of MDO

Last week was our last week of Preschool. Let me say, AGAIN, how blessed I feel to be teaching where the boys go. There are many a day when I get to simply sneak into their rooms and give them a kiss, play with them on the playground or go in for a hug if they are having  a tough day. Not only that their school is AMAZING! The boys are loving learning, playing, and come home with a new best friend daily. God was so good when he brought us all 3 there. 

Alright- excuse my ridiculous "every mom does this blog" moment. 

The boys on September 1st on their first day. 

And on our last day. 

When you see them every day I think you forget how much they have grown up in just a few short months.

They have officially switched over to "typical brothers" I think. They SO QUICKLY go from beating each-other up , to hugging each-other, to tattle tailing, to singing Jesus Loves Me in rounds. I love every minute. I LOVE being a boy mom. I love dirt pies, climbing trees, playing ninja and superheros, jumping into pillows, and playing pirate ships.